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Accompanyments 2

by Big Kitty

/
1.
Just sittin’ and forgettin’ about the ways I used to think about sinkin’ words into time thinking ‘bout you, where did you go with my name? I don’t remember who you were anymore the voices are quiet now, quieter than they were before now I'm yelling over the waves on the western shore what is that light that’s so far off that I can barely see behind a white oak tree in an open field in eastern Tennessee shining through the branches of somebody’s memory can it be the light that used to be that’s traveled through space for centuries begging for a place to sleep could it be coming for - from me? come over to me and smell the fields a-ripening come hither hillside and hear the bells a-jangling the cattle's necks and the dew dropping from the stars and the trillion eyes a-dreaming from up above as the vapor dances upon the manure pile on a winter’s morn crying at the end of the night, waiting at the end of the dream hoping at the end of my wavelength, way out towards the end of my song
2.
I dreamed I was dreaming a dream and in the dream I was dreaming a dream of you In the shadows of the swallows Not in the place where I am But in some far-away mystery land Where strange creatures unknown to humankind Stand or stood In silent mood Not responding to the movements of my hands I dreamed I was dreaming a dream And in the dream I was dreaming a dream Of them In the shadows of the leaves in the wind Sort of behind some glass Where all of my dream pass Not turning to look Not in this place where I am But in some far-away mystery land So very close to my fingertips But not responding to The movements of my hands I dreamed I was dreaming a dream And in the dream I was waking up from a dream of him In the shadows of the swallows Seemingly behind glass where all moves slowly fast Oh I dreamed i was dreaming a dream But where… oh where… oh where Is my dream now? And where am I ? I don’t know
3.
Where do you start when you don’t know what you’re looking for? Just ask questions? Like who are you and what’s your favorite color? Why was i born with impossible ideas, Eggs with sharp points? car horns with antlers Antlers with switchblades Hamlet’s beanie baby stall at the flea market…where did it go? it seemed destined for success now it seeks a new port Tacit voyaging, left long a golden age All the honor you can smoke rolled up in a Bible page all the horror you can hold in a dirty crescent of your fingernail Little left little soft But look luck is flooded with flesh flashing for cash shaking softly oh the best of em shaking nervously In the enclosure of the worst with chests puffed, blinded by their industrial eyebrows insightfully sightless, cause a few things do peek through reality's knotholes not a shred of fabric on their bodies a slingshot tucked between the butt cheeks groveling on gravel bleeding and fucking in the heat vacationing in cyclical time the hot perfume profusion the official oracle of orifices slipping on liquids red purple and putrid as I remember when sinking ass into slinking as into mud fogged up window walls nothing outside something is happening under tough circumstances altitude attitude had its expected but not desired effect cell phones are not allowed inside inventory diamonds check stones check checks check cautiously, meticulously shaking on it it’s done–a rare view nervously, softly barely audible
4.
by the river 01:33
If I traced a path from here to there would you remember where the water was where the boats were tied where the fish were laid out on the docks where the commerce of life took place where they said you were dangerous that place that bore my name where I wore sequins and lace with flair now I have no name I am not from that place where I was not born there and I did not die there I was put here apparently to see what’s behind this little bit of air push it back yet another jar what’s behind that? more dusty old jars and a lizard
5.
Rotten old head of Satan I found it in the stream A gnarled piece of wood or a strangely shaped stone Or something in between I nearly took it home with me To make a grotesque trophy But in the end I changed my mind And I splashed it back into the stream o well Betty says it’s still sittin’ there today Waitin’ on our children’s children Or maybe their children’s children’s children Or maybe their children’s children’s children’s children Or some people that come after that I said “Old gnarled head of Satan” Just a-sittin’ back and watching the show while the snowflakes melt on the water as she flows Yeah! old rotten head of Satan, a-waiting for the day When it can rise again and let the slaughter off the chain And break a chin… I’m not gonna be here then, no I’ll be far away from here I'll have forgotten everything, all about today Yes, I'll be far away in the far away beyond Out in the stars with a stream of cars that’s evacuating on the Governor's orders Where there’s no more arrows pointing to the world we knew Not not today don't worry and not right now don’t worry And not right here but Far away where the snow is smooth Where in his snake form Satan moves So don’t you say it’s all my fault So pass the pepper, and have the salt Maybe I should’ve buried you in Earth’s molten core I didn’t sow the seed, just threw it in the storm Oh in the muddy runoff stream, in the earthly stream the earth is a dream, that I can’t wake up from Goodnight
6.
except to me 02:13
Stray sticks scattered on the asphalt on the rainy misty misty morning what's that pile covered up by the tarp it looks like a waterfall why did they cover a waterfall with plastic? to keep it wet? that's just like them the fields are grazed down to dirt by the cows that are hot dogs by now One thing we need to do gently blow another wind blowing gentle thru the alley and the valley currant seeds are currency in the current season yell it at the top of your lungs when it’s your turn at the spelling bee oh a long worm longing for the fall time but it’s spring time how long till the tongs of the crows’ black belief system fall back like a fork in the road less traveled forgotten in leaves Zen zen zen zen some garden a thing they call zen, cut rocks and make walls out of them those who knew used to know things that if known now are known very little if at all same as my babylonian birthday It matters very little I am told They gave me trick candles That wouldn’t go out It matters very little if at all… Except to me
7.
I hear this in my head: Is that true? When I say I feel fine, is what I just said true? When I say, I look forward to? That what I just said, is that true? I have my doubts like a stream has trouts is that true I'm not sure Is that true? How could I be sure? I'm not sure, I have my doubts Well that’s something you’re sure about maybe I am maybe i'm not once I thought I knew but I long since forgot is that true can I trust myself oh certainly not I've got the same problem that everyone's got Is that true? Is what i just said true?
8.
Oh holy shit! Oh holy Acid USA full of places that i know blazing hot parking lot oh shirt full of holes! belly exposed! holes full of old shirts too bright to see the screen can't see a jump into a hole that leads to a room full of washing machines flickering fluorescents from the black clouds reveal rainbows of clothes revolving round colors of holes fill them eyes up full of colored holes meet them halfway it sounds like the finest thing your slinky will descend into the basement full of teddy bears teddy bear commerce and teddy bear ways and a passage that leads into another deeper cave full of infinite rooms each with a shrine to a different deity to a different deity with a pocket on his sleeve with a pocket on his overalls with an artist painting the washing machines O holy USA! O holy acid USA! O holy shit!
9.
interesting 02:58
No it doesn’t make any sense at all I start out sitting but end up lying on my back no I don’t understand why it happens no one’s ever told me though it’d be very strange for someone to be privy to such information and to get the notion to tell me and to follow through with the action knowing how uncomfortable that would make me feel I’ll follow through if I don’t fall asleep first which I just did so forget it how nearly everything was forgotten I guess it’s matchstick heaven that I seek a quiet place a playground of friends that bursts into flames at the drop of a pin oh I wouldn’t hurt anyone, not even him, wouldn’t make use of my fists or even my baseball and if I should be stricken, I would probably leave home drink booze until I die consider myself a victim… I hear the winners are being announced it’s time to start watching the television to train my mind towards luck you are they are you know they are really expensive who gives a fuck? well what supplies are required for the party? ice? candles? oh I shouldn't really call it a party for I shall be celebrating alone inside of a hollow tree with what appears to be a face inside scoop it out and see what it says I hunger for I think it should be… interesting
10.
Let me introduce you to my friends Let me introduce you to my friends Let me introduce you again Over and over again Let me introduce you to my friends Can you believe this is how the story ends? How familiar are you with the latest trends? Oh where oh where have I been? I’ve been diggin’ through the recycling bin I’ve been dividing up Berlin Looking in the mirror with a grin I’m loving the spin I’m in Spreading olive oil upon your skin Cause you know I’m going to introduce you to my friends Oh over and over again Oh I can’t believe that’s how the story ends I once possessed a fortune way back when Now I don’t have a nickel left to spend Can you believe that’s how the story goes Well it’s time for you to tell it all again Everybody’s looking at their toes Everybody’s looking like a drooping rose The space of a day, that’s how it goes Everybody’s trying to change their clothes Can you believe it’s how the story ends? Do you see the quiet lady on the bench? She opens her purse pulls out a wrench The rain begins to fall the park is drenched I can’t wake up, won’t you pinch me again?
11.
flat meet-up 03:06
Flat order of marching unstable a piece of wood rolling in the Tennessee River over and over a century or so until a matchstick or a toothpick it finds itself at play unsure the size of the day meanwhile a series of serious eyes sleep and wake some die shrinking in shrink wrap an unawareness of polka dots the morning after stability relentlessly trembles a migraine behind dark glasses black coffee with molasses shivering without evidence on the edge of generally any stirrup hanging off the song of trains I mean sport –Amateur… diesel– fossil fuel horses parasite houses people even ornamental plants a kind of big money symbiosis between the insect and the sun automatic watering system scientifically determined inaccurate but the green light shone down anyway in all the great languages, inferred indo-european, biblical measurements, lengths and widths, spans assembled just out of reach, blessed impossibility Oh! stretch out feel good get used to it And just ignore me and my impish ways my impertinent imperious swingin’, voluntary death which has already occurred in such a splendid way on the squeakin’ playground swings oh without a shadow of a doubt none can escape the dreamways of the adolescent giraffe in his skyscraper stable what a joy so hard to build so easily destroyed when you simply decide to frown on the angels who brought you here upon landing after you were carried so far more or less sleeping the whole time in their gentle sock hop rock and roll forgetting the way home when ⅔ of a rock fell on your brains and made you sing so here you go time for a meet up time for a rendez-vous which has already occurred in such a splendid way make me whole again make me whole again make me whole again make me whole again make me whole again make me whole again
12.
Far from here the people say four thousand years inside the cave why did it ever come to this out of a coma into the mist I am afraid I am dead I stumbled upon a land not mine a swarm of bees the scent of pine way out in the expanse of dreams lost in the forest upon the sea abandoned handkerchief soaked in thoughts a crazy massacre of colored dots a cold cloud sags like a rotten floor I don’t want to pick cotton no more beneath the glass where St Catherine is kept beckoning with her mummified finger the locomotive wheezing where the water once crept beckoning with her floating finger the nearer you get the softer your lines your teeth more spongelike your eyes gentle and kind and impossible to find they sued you for impersonation you’ve still got those old worries on your mind why not make them mine? I would make them so fine i'll step in with lipstick and a pistol i'll wear gray shoes and a pink carnation If I knew any better Which of course I don’t I’d have forgotten every letter Of my name and I’d be sitting here Not knowing if I were here at all… but I’m like the little blue engine I feel I do I feel I do and how i feel i do makes me just like you tomorrow night I dreamed of the Ramones in the roman empire they were standing under an arch singing i wanna be crucified they looked at me once their wheels caught fire this happened on the ides of march I got stuffed in a drawer with some traffic cones they told me to ignore my brittle bones forget my depression leave rainbows alone since then i've grown cold take a back seat to the swivel chair breathe the festival air hear the lions roar go ask the fortune teller what you’re crying for the fluorescent lighting is poor the whole world just shookes up over 600 pages in my book and now the rain falls the wind's secrets are told all the great detectives have retired or sold out and the ancient prophecies in dying tongues crowd around the bared breasts before the flood that soaks into your pores like animal blood from a fountain the tension is mounting the sacrificed beasts an eye for an eye and a curse on your teeth and a purse on your tongue golden fields of wheat mildew on rye and all that I asked of you sigh while the guard dogs chased thieves was to dig a hole under a sycamore tree but all you could see was a witch hazel bush and you fell in the hole you didn’t see me push and all the nervous rhythms pushed back remember now remember now all the memories flushed out all the ropes left slack all the knots undone no time to reflect on what might have been won the Earth is embracing your body and spirit might as well surrender might as well let it
13.
Weakened by the week-end working in the garden leave the oil can where it is let it be, says the baby in the stroller a teenage girl gives a lollipop to her crush a youthful goof impish uncouth not a mark is left of that a bead of sweat rolls across the sugar glazed sweet rolls a Dunkin Donuts franchise future looking back on that lollipop back to the garden where the oil can tipped over no one saw who it was blame the dog leaking out mercurial the crowd goes wild congratulations to the coach ice cubes and gatorade down his shirt yesterday’s sunburns from the day at the lake they hurt the celebrations already in slow motion already long gone, the players disenfranchised sleeping in front of their respectful TVs oh where are they now? oil oozing in the flower bed beauty’s control center so they say the little men fat bearded ones with pipes in the garden only once and not again not my problem not my friend the quiet days oh the dark days of sleep were coming here and now they’ve passed on by their place was then now it is done time to gather the wild thyme that grows up on the mountaintop turn that oil can upright as Roy Orbison once said to do
14.
sunken lane 02:01
Here we are again again with the 2 walls of dirt on each side again but a bit deeper this time oh when I look up for 20 centuries I see the Earth growing around me oh as small as I am - i am safe here in the trench summer grass burns and ferns emerge and the great green trees filter the sun I found this song on my tongue curled up on both sides like a cigar who do I belong to whose dream am i following terrible blazing eyes cut through here the old wars tramped down these roots bodies dragged over these stones bootlegged bones if the ghost won’t leave me alone I'll do it all again, dig the deepest grave that's ever been I won’t spare any of my enemy's friends dig deeper and deeper with every step speaking some forgotten alphabet looking for love wherever goddesses go I was born to play myself in their show don’t grin in my face don't bend my wires with your mind i'll put space between your head and your spine it’s easy to tell that I mean what I say if you have any doubt best not get in my way my eyes were made to see and slice and never relent the sky is green the ground is soft i'll never die, i won’t get lost
15.
watershed 01:19
Wonder what they’d say if they saw wonder what they’d have seen winter winding waterfall spider on a log whose hunger most mature sucks the beetles dry all swept away like this like that seven tons of years picked clean lie flat seventy sticks seventy-seven bones a teapot of tears why am I sitting here alone? where else could I be I don’t know, I don’t know wonder what they'd say fly, leap into flowing water how am I s'posed do that? that’s its way that’s the way it goes its own way breaking up and bonding and as for me I’ll be going now in several minutes if they don't come before to tie me up to a tree
16.
remorse code 02:17
Remorse Code fool Strength mayor of a ghost town goes down stairs at a phone booth colored wires exposed and as quiet as not quite enough sand to merit the moniker mouse, I mean mass he counts one grain at a time an eventuality remaining virtual uncaptured fractured in a sculpture garden with dogs off-leash moving like cloud formations in preparations for announcements of high winds and chances of rain upon closer inspection his eyelids peeled like hard-boiled eggs at the big ends where the air bubble is eyeballs fixed on her independence day who are you talking about, Spider-Friends, I’m looking at you Wim Hof! mayor said, I knew I felt your terrible ice on me, harvesting my data staring at the receiver worms coming out of the holes holes meant for voices other holes meant for coins voices carrying silver platters of words like mustachioed waiters can we get some mustard and water? ghosts howling in the night shine, scatter dark matter nothing matters perhaps you should just leave this place behind and go where? oh just change your mind go chase love and live your life strutting through Cincinnati with a switchblade knife let me tell you something this is an old place abandoned long ago some say it was aliens some say it was owls I think they’re both right just listen just shout about
17.
I never said my name I never said my name I never said my name I never said my name I never said my name oh lord And I never said my name I never said my name oh no I never said my name was Jesus
18.
inside the fellows of the moon at the mouth of the graveyard at the edge of the cowherd as he turns sixteen tie! tie! tie! tightly, tightly! the string around the neck lead him forward he's lonely and sings to himself oh lovelorn! over yellow and green oceans that shine with a grassy sheen Charlie Sheen five pink petals sprouting from his teeth that hot shot smile smiles at me he makes me laugh but I wish he'd leave suffers a pilgrim, the pilgrim is me touching the tips of his clouds with the lips of his propeller pack gives him a coin and moves on that's when I heard the cows what are these stumps that once were storms? what are these sparrows which once were pharoahs? all seemed to be in order when the go-ahead was given but now yellows and greens the sheens of the clean surfaces all is mere testimonial evidence out of place like a lawyer's embrace the farmer and judges at odds in this country place plucking the strings way up at the headstock hearing them ring like the moon's lawyer's livestock chime! chime! chime! chime! chime! with the amniotic sack all a rind like a single watermelon in a mine field just one child just one finger in the barbed-wire wild greens and yellows on the moon's clean bling bling diamond sheen pilgrim with his pack propeller pack cowherd all alone, angels fly one little calf a string around his neck singing lonesome songs lovelorn songs summer's come and gone singing for nothing for no one
19.
Love at all costs Cut corners you're the boss Softly closer Coming, coming are you will you do you while you seem to will you really descend And come to me that's the sound of my asking or does it drift to the side as though I were illusion unseen by any but I and that quite little from a height no i don't see a thingl heavy as a body bag full and with the same urgency must I be got rid of some encumbrance same exuberance dripping out of a zipper elegantly no longer in control not afraid anymore only tired only broke down but not sleepy perhaps sleepy but not willing to sleep not willing to sleep I must drip! I love you heavily, elegantly
20.
A red and brown house a sick man dying a head thinking speaking to the fog the cold morning a skeleton a skull wide-eyed why'd he die only to be beaten into gold like a fish flying out of the water on a line only to be lying in a bucket and then frying in a pan only to become some protein in another man well that's not all for organisms take the organs or guns away and live
21.
All or nothing a scrawl a diagonal diamond dying of dilation getting too wide spreading too thin leapt out of an eye like a hot tear on a tear and a terrain of lament becomes a meadow of mint sent the sorrows of the land airborne the nose homes in as the light dies the scarecrows climb down from their poles look for sickles and scythes in the tool sheds Elsewhere… a whale surfaces in the moonlight a clown with a telescope observes the dark surface his make-up black and white in the starlight You know they aren’t real but do you? You know they aren’t real but are you? sure, when they called your name you took a step back to look again you took it all in and with a yawn you moved on allergy tears in the eyes Was that the old world or was it already new by then? Was it I who stuffed the clothes? you asked who painted the faces who hammered down the poles from a distance he is watching you the sky full of shiftless clouds fears that wobble in the wind the wind picks up every which a-way, Always no ways you take a stick you drag it through the sand no don’t ask it’s it’s it’s it’s it’s no one it's no face it's no on it’s nothing and all
22.
saw the king 02:08
Saw the king through the windows looking out through the windows at the court yard garden his gaze carried on the wind over the almond trees the king threw the windows at the tree and the glass shattered and the birds’ blood was blue and mine was too red to be blue, I fell as though dead oh the clods of blue mud the clouds of blue scud, the wind opened and blew the skies blue saw the king looking at me through the blood bloom on my brow and the gloom sagging the birds dead but not I after all I was only bleeding
23.
gravel road 02:51
any one any one gravel road golden bowl blazing down a brown lounge chair broken in the pile of trash smoldering ash Ski poles old car taken apart old gas can office chair Historical markers Old funny papers gravel road with an Angel horse running alongside the day the music died I looked, apollo was shot he fell off the saddle long shadows of pebbles oh where’s he at? I wanted to play oh broken saucers like those scooting through the stars well anyone anyone give me a ball that’s rolling the ball that’s been floating down the valley of long lost love a long long while while the pink sheep climb up in the moon carrying their marshmallow load down the gravel road gravel road across the sky across the sky gravel road across the sky

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released August 1, 2023

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Big Kitty Toulouse, France

Big Kitty "Is the greatest artist, for my buck, in the business today," - Frank Sinatra

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